121 - Decluttering Keys: Clarity and safety

Summary

In this episode of Decluttering Untangled, Heather Tingle discusses the often-overlooked emotional and practical challenges of decluttering old keys. She explores the psychological burden these keys can represent, including feelings of responsibility and fear of regret. Heather provides practical steps for organising and deciding what to keep or let go, emphasising the importance of clarity and intentionality in the decluttering process.

Chapters

00:00
The Burden of Unused Keys

02:43
Understanding the Emotional Weight of Keys

05:39
Practical Steps to Declutter Keys

08:33
Deciding What to Keep and Let Go

11:51
Finding Security Through Clarity

Transcript

Heather Tingle (00:00.824)
Hello, Untanglers, and welcome back to another episode of Decluttering Untangled with me, your host, Eddard Tingle. So today, I want to talk to you about something that has happened with a client recently. And this is something that I see all the time. And that is, as we go through a drawer, you know that drawer, the one with the batteries, takeaway menus, a random screwdriver and some rusty screws, that junk drawer that we always seem to find, one item.

And that is keys. Bunches of keys usually, or generally, like a Tupperware container full of old keys, and we've got absolutely no idea what they are for. So that's something I think could be a series in itself, which actually I might do. And that's gonna be those annoying little things that are big stressors, because I think there's so much more to something like a key than the initial object itself.

So what I would like you to consider is when was the last time you used one of those keys? And you probably wouldn't even know because you've got no idea what that key is for. And then I would like you to ask the question, when was the last time you thought about that key? Now you might not think about it fully, but probably what's happening in the back of your mind, every single time you open that drawer,

Those keys are there and your brain goes, still don't know what they're for. This makes me feel bad. So they might be tiny, but they kind of feel a little bit irrelevant because they're not really doing anything. But actually they can weigh quite heavy. So let's talk a little bit about the keys and what they represent and what you can do about decluttering them.

So I think the keys represent so many different things because if you know what they are, which could be things like your old home, old jobs or old versions of you, they can represent those things. They can also represent things like responsibility. You you were grown up now, isn't that a terrifying thing? And there's a lot of issues with things like having that responsibility on you, but also there's that huge part of that just in case thinking, like what happens if.

Heather Tingle (02:24.054)
or this is on me, what happens if I get rid of it and then I need it? What happens if someone asked me for it and I haven't got it? So there's a lot of fear attached to keys. And I think it's that scary thing of them being a one-off and irreplaceable. And the big one is that fear of the responsibility of it being given to you and you doing something wrong. And I think that that is...

one of the greatest things that we struggle with is worrying that we've done something wrong. We like to be perfect. We like to do everything right. We hate being criticized and keys are all wrapped up in that because a lot of the things that they symbolize is like access to something. So they might symbolize access to something that you don't even have anymore. So for many people, throwing away a key feels like you're closing a door permanently on some possible event in the future.

like you're shutting yourself out. But actually a lot of the time, you're never gonna want to go through that door anyway in the first place, because you don't even know where that door is or what it is. So I think that's something to be aware of. I also think if you're in your diversion, keys are not easy, because you need to do some work with them to declutter them. Like you've got to take some time out to actually check what they may be for.

and you can't get an immediate yes or no result unless you put that work in. So we don't get that immediate feedback of a yes or no decision, which makes it harder. So you've got to spend some time sorting them out. That makes it feel like a big job. That makes it feel like not a priority. But I think one of the most difficult things is it's not easy to test them and the risk therefore feels bigger than the reward for doing it. So it's far easier.

to have them in a container in a junk drawer, not causing any problems, then the stress of trying to figure out what they fit and the risk then of letting them go of something you might need in like a year's time, for example. So that makes it even harder for us because the risk versus reward isn't even. And we also struggle with ambiguous decisions. So because there's no immediate yes, I've done the right thing.

Heather Tingle (04:36.972)
It's almost like it's hanging over us into the future for such a long time. Like how long will it take for you to feel okay about letting that key go? Will it be six months? Will it be a year? Will it be two years? Will it be 10 years? Now you ask yourself, how long have you actually had those keys for? It's probably longer than a year. So with all that in mind, there's a big worry about regretting it later. And a lot of time actually,

You don't regret it. The way of having it around is worse than any of the possibilities you can think of. So if you explore that possibility of what could happen, if you find that you needed that key and you threw it away, what actually is the worst that can happen? What would then happen? A lot of the time what happens is you might have to pay for a locksmith to create a new key or get a new lock. And do know what?

That's okay. That's maybe worth the risk for a lot of things, especially if they've been hanging around for a long time, because I know having had to have locks replaced, it wasn't a big faff. The locksmith came, they did it really quickly and it didn't cost an extreme amount of money compared to the weight of having those things hanging around over your head for a long time.

So looking at the practicalities of decluttering these things. The main thing I think is to get all the keys that you've got together. So get them out of those random pots and places that you might keep them. And then I would then create a list, even if it's only on your phone, of all the things that these keys might possibly open. So think external places like sheds and garages. Think of your doors and your windows. Think of tins.

So it might be that you've had a cash tin at some point or a diary with a lock on it or a trunk in the attic with all old things in it or old suitcases. Think of all the things that might possibly ever have had a key. And then I want you to list all those possibilities and think, have you got those items? Now for some things, you might not know what you've got or what you haven't. And that might need.

Heather Tingle (06:43.744)
an exploration or it might need keeping to one side until you've decluttered that space. So for example, until you've decluttered your loft or attic where those things are, until you've gone through the sentimental items where your diaries and things are, until you've checked all those suitcases that you've been meaning to deal with, that's okay. You might need to pause for later, but getting them together will really help.

And once you've got those ideas, the next step is splitting your keys into three categories. So you would split them into, I definitely know what this key is for. I think I might have an idea what that key is for. And the third category is I've got absolutely no clue what this is for. It was probably left by the old owners of the house and they probably didn't know what it was for either. Okay. Now automatically by splitting it into those three,

categories, you've reduced that big task into slightly less overwhelming three tasks. And that makes it a little bit easier to start with. And then I would go and double check. So those are the first one that you think you know what they're for.

just go double check it and then label it. I cannot stress enough how important it is to label it because if you get stuck somewhere, you need to tell someone to get a key for something. They don't want to be searching through every single key on a video call to you or asking, it the one with the red tag or the green tag? You can go into this drawer in this place and then you get the key that says this on it and then you can do it.

So keep those in a separate place because you've done the hard work with that, you know what they are for. Okay? And then you want to do the test later stuff, the stuff that you're not too sure about. If you find something in that that you know it's gonna work and fits in that thing, you can then label it and put it in the done pile. Wonderful. And then all you have left is the, thought I knew what this is for, but actually it wasn't. And that I have got absolutely no idea what this is for.

Heather Tingle (08:51.948)
and that's when that list is gonna come in handy. And then I want you to go through each room in your home as if you were an estate agent or a real estate agent and see what that key could possibly open. Now, obviously, if you've got a big key and it doesn't fit any doors that you're aware of and it's not likely to fit into like a little diary or something like that, then you know you've probably got nothing else like that, then it's okay to let that go and put it in a metal recycling bin

or put it in a buy nothing group for someone who might want it to do some art with for example, or some sculpture. But I find the quickest way to get rid of some keys, and this is joke by the way, if you've got children, is to give the keys as a toy for your children and you will never find them ever again. There you go. That's the quick exit for you. So what I would then do, if that panics you a bit about letting them go straight away or giving them to small children, maybe don't do that because it's probably a choke hazard. I would then put them into a

tin or a Tupperware container and I would put them back in that box and put a date on it. And what I would suggest you do is you keep them for a year. Now this may not sound like a thing that a professional declutterer should tell you to do. Oh yes, hold onto them for a year. That's a long time, but let's face it, we're adults. We are allegedly adults now. A year goes very, very quickly. And what that means is you've gone through each season with that box still not being opened. So.

That means that you'll have gone through summer and some items that you would only ever use in summer and some items that you don't only ever use in winter. You've gone through them, you've used all the things. And that means if you have not used them in a year and you're risk averse like me, you know you can then let them go because it's highly, highly unlikely, especially given how long you've had them previously that you're ever going to use them again. Now our brain is gonna try and find reasons to keep things because it's scary.

An example would be if it's no car key, you don't own the car anymore, you can put that straight in the bin. You do not need to keep it. You do not need to find the ex owner. You do not need to send it to the garage. It is okay to let it go. If you moved house, it's highly likely that the locks will have been changed. You do not need to keep that key. However, it is okay to keep a sentimental key. For example, a key to your old home or your parents' old home.

Heather Tingle (11:15.872)
it's okay to keep those if it is important to you. However, if you're not sentimentally attached to it, it is okay to let go. The thing is, one of the most important things I want you to take away from today is to know by keeping old keys, it does not create security. And I mean that in both senses of the word, but actually the main one is security in yourself and in your home. What it actually creates is ambiguity and pressure and stress and delay.

of decisions and procrastination. So what actually creates security is clarity and knowing every single thing in your home and where it lives and what it does and why you're keeping it. That is what gives you security. And while ever you got those weird little things that you don't know what they do and you don't know what they're for, you don't have that level of contentment and security that the E-Cluttering brings. So I really want you to think about that. There we go.

and did not realise I could talk for this length of time on keys, but there you go. So I hope that gives you something to think about. Maybe it gives you a H-S-I-O, which is a Heather says it's okay to let go of these things. Now, obviously don't sue me if you let go of something that you need later, but do think about worst case scenario when you're letting something go. What would happen if you did not have this key and suddenly you needed it? The answer is you will probably find a solution because we are really, really good at that. Okay.

So until next time, be kind to yourself, remember you're not alone and keep untangling.